by Craig Sebastian
Do you shed tears every day? The reason I ask is because, like you, I'm new to this whole grieving process. At times I find myself not able to cope with the easiest of tasks. There are other times when I simply can't muster up the energy to get into the shower.
Then there’s that uneasy feeling I get when I run into a friend that knows me-- and Jordan. The look on that person's face instantly makes me transition into almost another person, trying to ACT as if EVERYTHING IS GOOD. Then there are the times when a song comes on that reminds me instantly of my precious child, and then the tears well up and fill my eye-sockets. Or a picture pops up on my Facebook timeline and AGAIN I am reminded that my pain is STILL in control of my emotions.
It's not always bad when the tears stream down my face; there have been some tears of joy as well. Remembering some of our silly, funny times we shared. The tears are, in my opinion, reminding me EXACTLY HOW MUCH LOVE I HAVE FOR MY JORDAN.
I keep hearing people say it gets EASIER in time. For me that statement is quite the contrary to how I feel. I miss my boy and the tears are a reminder of how special he is to me. I can't even finish writing anymore because of the tears running down my face...